I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
