hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize