i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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