Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
