Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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