I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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