I think my vagina is haunted
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
