I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize