We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
