So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
