batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
ttyl tear gas
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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