Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Randomize
