I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
