we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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