I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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