I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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