you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
My dick has a subreddit
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Randomize
