watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
