bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
