She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
