he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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