Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
