Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
