my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
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