I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
