do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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