I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Randomize
