It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
this will be a night to untag.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
