You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
you had me at cake vodka
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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