There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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