Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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