Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I would fuck him just for his dog
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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