I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
