I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
