Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
