I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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