Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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