He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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