I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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