It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
