im about as happy as oj after his trial
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
