He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
