Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
