now i know why i became what i already was.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
