ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
he wants to bone in the snuggie
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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