he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I believe in your delicious
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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