I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
