I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
