I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
