This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
